Friday, December 02, 2011

The Mean Streets

The Tool brothers "ruled" the streets for a time. Amongst their own circles they had a "reputation". They preferred darkened alleys, or milling crowds after the pubs have closed.

The cycle of seasons rolls around, and several hundred Tongans arrive in town, for some intensive field work. Yep, several hundred of them!

Tongans are physically huge, and stereotypically no strangers to street level violence.
They are also hard physical workers and usually in peak condition.

It took only one night for the streets to undergo a change of management.

Apparently the changing of the guard was, as spectator sports go, very unpleasant. The Tool bros. weren't seen on the streets again until weeks after the last Tongan left town.

The Tool bros, without any sense of irony, went to the police to complain that they couldn't even walk the streets in their own town.

One of their girlfriends wrote a series of letters to the editor about the "injustice" of it all.

This served only to convince us that she was not making a short term injudicious choice of boyfriend, but was in fact terminally dumb.

At the Wayside Tavern we thought it quite funny. So did every other pub in town.

The Tool bros. have not had quite the same air of gravitas about them since.

Bit hard to pull off acting the toughest bunch around when everybody has seen them get the flogging of their lives, heard them squealing like a pig (yep, high pitched squeal) for mercy, for help, for anything.

2 comments:

lavrenti lenin said...

I've met Samoans and Hawaiians in the service. How bloody stupid do you have to be to try to roll one of that lot?

JeffS said...

INCREDIBLY stupid.